Assorted Awful Advice - A series of articles I write explaining how to fill one’s life with suffering, failure, and frustration. Updated every so often.

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Half Empty or Half Full? - In which we finally determine whether the glass is half empty or half full.

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The Blood Drained from the Young Man’s Face - In which a Frank Turek tweet is repeatedly parodied.

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The Myriad Problems and Mixed Fortunes of Jack - A mock epic I wrote in high school, told through a series of word problems I was forced to present before my math classes. Starring and sometimes written with the help of my friend Jack.

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Your Honor Jokes - A list of defenses to use in court.